The school year has started

Tristan, Kassi and Toly have started school. Home-school funded under a charter school. Tristan has started foil fencing classes. Fencing is also known as physical-chess, a sport for the mind as well as the body. Tristan Loves it with a true love that only little boys can have for a sport that involves battling an opponent with a sword.

Kassi has started ballet. It is a serious ballet academy. She is a serious girl and embraces her responsibility as a potential ballerina with determination and focus.

Toly hasn't started any outside classes. Along with Kassi he is doing "teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons." He is only a little way behind Kassi. They are both on the cusp of reading.

I have been playing games with the kids. We mostly play crazy eights when it is all four kids and I. Rome mostly holds the cards and plays out of turn. He has fum anyway. I play kings-corners with just Kassi and Tristan. Tristan plays it so well. Between he and I it is merely a challenge of who has the better luck.

I have also been playing Monopoly with the three eldest. It is really helping with counting and place-value regarding money. Having been physically restricted for such a long time it changed the types of play I have with the kids. A few months ago we went to an estate sale where the couple obviously played bridge because they had many decks of cards. I bought over twenty beautiful collectors set decks, a domino set and other game related stuff for five dollars. Now we have plenty of decks of cards. I can let the kids play crazy eights alone and not worry about losses or destruction.

East Bay Depot for creative re-use
It is a wonderful store (toly calls them scrappy-shops) that sells donated supplies. some of the stuff is old and technologically replaced, offal from industry or just donated by businesses. It is a wonderland place for the artist type. Tabitha gets much of our school supplies there for pennies on the dollar. An example is, I bought a brand new monopoly set from 1972 for three dollars.

The best tool for the school year has been Paddy-the-ipad. A gift to the kids for the upcoming school year. Given that we use online resources for homeschooling extensively the computer has been constantly busy. We have been at this place where we need another computer desperately for a while. Another apple computer is out of the question since the financial ruin of 2011--we'll never waste another penny on microsoft even indirectly. We reluctantly settled for an Ipad. It has exceeded our every expectation and has become integral to our household overall. One caveat, no blogging from paddy. It is just too clunky from a browser interface. Blogger needs an app for that. Two words - angry birds... ...enough said.

I am mostly healed from the heart surgery. The only remaining recovery is muscle tone. I put on a little belly too. Laying around for two months will do that. We have been going to church very regularly which is saying something given Orthodox attendance expectations. I am officially converted to Orthodox, they sped up my Chrismation because of my impending heart surgery. Tabitha and the kids are still Catechumens for several more months. We live too far from St. Nicholas for our taste. The place is truly mystical, beauty for every sense oozes from every fiber of the place. To quote Sean Gleeson "God lives there."

happy birthday tristan

tristan is such a great boy. he is responsible beyond his years but still very much a fun loving boy.

gifts were a little shy this year since me being off work for the last 45 days. he is simply happy with what little he receives. it makes me proud that he is like that.
we got him dangerous book for boys.

a new charger for his Nintendo DSi. it is like a whole new toy for him. He and I went to Harry Potter 7 1/2 last night. he was so appreciative that he thanked me over a dozen time just on the short walk home from the theater. he glowed with appreciation. I'll never forget the beaming look in his eyes.

happy birthday rome

Here he is holding the flower he is named after Romneya

He is three, amazing and magical. Happy third birthday Romneya Martin Grey O'Melay!

Surgery Success

Hi, this is Tabitha, Karl's wife, updating.

Karl had open heart surgery yesterday morning and it was a success. The surgeon was able to repair Karl's mitral valve and replace his aortic valve with a bio-valve. Karl did very well, not even requiring transfusion. I waited at the hospital during the surgery and saw Karl soon after he was moved to the ICU. He looks pretty good, considering. I also visited him later in the day yesterday. He is experiencing a lot of pain, as one might expect, but the nurses say he is really strong (already off the ventilator and drinking on his own) and should feel a lot less pain by today. I will be visiting him this morning. At this time I do not have a room number for Karl and he is not able to accept many visitors in the ICU. Karl has been though an amazing ordeal. Our children have not seen him yet, that too must wait until he is settled into a recovery wing. 

The surgeon let me know that while everything went well, it was apparent by his heart that Karl desperately needed this operation. We are so glad to be on this side of it. Your hopes, help and prayers have been and will continue to be instrumental. 

Please contact me for more updates tomelay at gmail dot com . We don't know at this point how long Karl will be in the hospital. I will keep you updated as I know.


Love, Tabitha & Kids

Before the operation

Nearly there!

Karl has been admitted

Karl is in the hospital again, and right now the timeline has his open heart surgery scheduled for Friday. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Thank you to all who have reached out with help and kind words.

The perfect storm

Everyone has staph growing on their skin. Our bodies repel the stuff and normally we just happily fight infection and continue. I was exposed to carbon monoxide in a boiler room. The CO bound up my hemoglobin and didn't allow any white blood cells to replicate to fight the simple staph bacteria. I got terribly ill with the Carbon Monoxide poisoning. Later, the doctors discovered that I was born with a bicuspid ventral which really isn't a big deal but it does cause turbulence in my heart. That turbulence is where infection likes to collect. The staph infection seized the opportunity when nothing was fighting it. It went septic literally overnight. The common staph settled in my left Ventricle and severed a cord to my Mitral valve. These cords keep the valve from prolapsing. Now my heart doesn't work properly and back pressure to my lungs causes my lungs to fill with plasma easily. The doctors have me on high blood pressure medicine--even though my blood pressure is normal. I get tired easily because of my heart and this is exacerbated by the blood pressure medicine. They don't want my heart to work too hard.

Now in five weeks I must go have open heart surgery to replace the prolapsed valve and while they are in there they will replace the bicuspid ventricle.

The perfect storm continues...
As you know we have only moved here six months ago. I was hired back at my old company but under a trial period. This trial period was cut short and they hired me in a permanent fashion roughly five months ago. My company offers subsidized health insurance but I never got my three month review. My decision at open enrollment (after being hired three months) to decline health insurance wasn't really a decision at all. Given my introductory pay scale and no three month review to offer any hope of a raise we simply couldn't afford our half of the premiums. We opted to wait until January (normal open enrollment).

So here we sit without health insurance. Healthcare facilities that take the uninsured are so over crowed that getting simple blood work takes an entire day. Most of that day is spent processing analog records and confirming that I do indeed qualify for the services that they will render. Every doctor that I have seen has been top notch but the callousness of the general staff is degraded to the lowest form of apathy and feels like it is sucking the life out of you as you talk to them.  Of course they must develop burnout and callous themselves to it otherwise they would surely go crazy because the need is so great.

So you might ask why not file a workers comp claim. First we are going to get this all paid for, albeit with excruciating hours of waiting. Your tax dollars already pay for this kind of stuff. But you might also know that your tax dollars are paying for incredible waste the magnitude is unimaginable until you actually live it. Best case, workers comp would only pay a percentage of my final bill. That worker comp insurance company would fight me tooth and nail into legal oblivion trying to prove that the liability isn't theirs. Furthermore, I cannot ruin a wonderful company (sun light and power) with a 500,000 insurance claim that would skyrocket their workers comp premiums to a level that the company cannot sustain--even if my claim were bullet-proof.

Instead I will sit for hours on end waiting in the most awful waiting rooms to get the care that I need. My wonderful wife has sat by my side and endured the soul wrenching onslaught of apathetic waste and waiting. These systems aren't broken and degraded because of incompetence or intended waste. They are stuck in this awful place between huge oppressive insurance companies which debilitate them and the trickle of over bureaucratically tangled funds from Uncle Sam.

Our friends have been wonderfully supportive and we have genuinely needed their help. I am so appreciative of them it makes my heart swell with pride for humanity and the village that we enjoy the full support of. Thank you, thank you our great friends we appreciate you in ways that go beyond simple words.

Love, peace and blessings to you all.

More Karl Update

Karl will probably be coming home today! Having him home be such a relief.

He will be at home with us for 3-4 weeks if all goes well. We'll be administering the IV antibiotics during that time. Doctors will keep a close watch on his heart health. Then he will return to the hospital for open heart surgery which will replace the heart valves (mitral and aortic) that were damaged by the sepsis. The surgery is very serious and will last about 5 hours. He will be on a heart/ lung bypass machine and general anesthesia. Afterwards, he will be in the hospital again for a week, then home for 3 months of recovery before he can return to work.

Right now we are struggling with a decision about which kind of valves. We are so early in the decision making process that we are not even sure we have a choice between the two. But if we do, it would be an important one. It seems like every day has an important development like this.

We are so appreciative of all who have helped us so far. It has allowed me to visit Karl, the kids to visit, us to eat and life to go on for the last week. The kids love the company of this 'village' atmosphere and so do I. We are excited for Karl's homecoming but frankly we may need more help for the first week with him back than when he was in the hospital.

Our friend Patricia Scott continues to organize the care calendar. She is adjusting it occasionally so that it best fits our needs. Your meals have been delightful and nothing has gone to waste. Please feel free to call Patricia or myself about the calendar if you have questions, or go to the page and just sign up.

Your prayers are always welcome and appreciated.


To contact us, Facebook is probably the best option. Just make sure you leave a note when you add me as a friend so I know who you are. 


Tabitha O'Melay | Create your badge

Update from Tabitha

Some of you may already know from reading my blog or following along on Facebook:

Karl O'Melay is hospitalized with a septic blood infection. It is not contagious, but has infected his heart valves and he will need valve replacement surgery. The surgery can't be done until the infection is completely eradicated. He is very, very ill. The good news is that the antibiotics are working well and Karl is already looking so much better. He has great doctors. He's at Summit in Oakland which is a great heart health hospital.

Our family physician feels that probable Carbon Monoxide exposure on Wednesday of last week, which alone would not have debilitated Karl for more than a couple of days, suppressed Karl's system and at home a common bacteria that rarely is dangerous bloomed in his system and took over. The bacteria proliferated in his heart valves and damaged them. The infection thus was circulated through his body with every beat of his heart. The functionality of Karl's heart valves is greatly impaired and he will require valve replacement. In the past two days we have learned that the mitral and Aortic valves must be replaced through open heart surgery, which will be done after 4 weeks of IV antibiotics to completely clear the sepsis.

We appreciate your prayers, thoughts, and offers of help. As you can imagine this has not been easy on our four young children or myself. We are not able to be by Karl's side very much, and I can't leave the kids for too long to visit alone. Karl, naturally, is the worst off and he needs to not be worrying too much about the future or us right now.

To that end our close friends the Scotts have set up an online care calendar for people who wish to sign up for meals, groceries, housework, rides to and from the hospital, errands or child care. You can bring personal meals or offer take out, etc. Any offer of help is welcome. If the calendar doesn't have a spot for what you'd like to offer please call Patricia Scott (the coordinator) to offer it. She can be reached at 510 913 3151. Below is the calendar information:

Patricia McMahon Scott has set up a helpful calendar for people who wish to help us by donating time or meals. Some things can be donated long distance. Contact Patricia if you have questions. Thank you so much.

Enter the following info for our calendar:

CALENDAR ID : 77273
SECURITY CODE : 5087

CareCalendar - Filling the needs
www.carecalendar.org
Web based system to organize meals and other help for families during a time of illness or life changing event, such as the birth of a baby or death of a family member

Kassi's first art show

She only has one of her pieces up there. The flower vase on the left.

She is so proud..

Flexible

It is funny how it seems like we have been here forever now. Missouri seems almost like a dream. It was a pleasant dream. Toly still talks frequently about Missouri. The other day he was telling Rome that he wished we had a chicken back in Missouri named Borsky. Borsky is that Swedish chef from the muppet show. It is also the most derogatory name in Rome's vocabulary. When he's mad at Toly he'll say "you're a Borsky."

Rome is so feisty. He's two and likely the most feisty child yet--I wouldn't have believed that possible three years ago. Here he is clad in tunic.

We were attending a period accurate archery contest.

Toly and Rome played with this little boy on the left.

They had considerable fun even if mom was off shooting most of the day.


Kassi got bored since there were no other children her age/gender. She found an old notebook in the car and had to crush some berries for ink. She drew a good portion of the morning that way.

A piece of pine cone as a quill. Such a resourceful girl. During the afternoon Kassi went on the archery hunt with Tabitha and Tristan.

Tristan was a true star. I am so proud how confident and comfortable he is around everyone. The archers in this line up are the best in the bay area. The one directly in front of Tristan is his instructor.

They are attempting to hit a flying dragon traversing the range on a zip-line. Certainly not many other subordinate archers would have proudly stood in that line-up. Here he is taking pointers from another instructor that came down for the shoot.

Everyone was impressed that this was only his second time shooting a bow.
He is so focused.



I especially like this photo of him.

He is serious, calm and comfortable.

Tabitha made all of our matching attire.

She really enjoyed herself also.


The juxtaposition of a farm-centric life to a life of perusing interests is amazing. I am so happy to be able to take the kids for a short bike ride to the beach any time we like. Some of my fondest memories as a child were playing in the sandy shores of Lake Michigan. All of the kids love the sandy beach, it is in their blood. I especially like how I can show up with the clan of kids bringing nothing except drinking water. Most other families on the beach will have a menagerie of toys and tents and their kids will be bored. Where my kids have nothing except the sand, sticks, shells and whatever else they can find and manage to drum up huge excitement. Assaults on castles, tsunami defending break-waters, wild west stockades and lots of water play are on the itinerary.

The kids have completely settled in here. We haven't built any raised beds for greens and herbs yet. This will probably happen within a few weeks. My job is amazing. I love it so much it is hard to imagine why I ever left it those five and a half years ago. Don't misunderstand, I wouldn't trade our time in Missouri for anything. I simply get so much satisfaction from my job and the work that I do. Those five years in Missouri I took whatever work I could find. The farm was my source for job satisfaction.

I actually have free time

If forecasters are correct, gas prices are threatening to reach previously unimaginable highs. I have been getting my old bicycle ready to commute back and forth to work. I had to put new tires on it because while scrubbing the decade of dust off it the inner tube popped out the sidewall. I put slick narrow street tires on it. It got a new seat about a month ago.

I bought a new set of battery powered work tools. I got a set containing a new drill, impact driver, sawzall, and circular saw. My old dewalt set has had battery issues and finally the sawzall broke. For the purchase price of new batteries and repair cost of my sawzall I bought a shiny new set.

Plus

I will keep my old dewalt set at home so I can work on stuff around here. Frequently charging crappy batteries at home is more acceptable than at work.

This works into my bicycling commute plan perfectly since I will no longer have to transport my work tools home every time I need to get something done at home.

I also re-purposed an old bike trailer into a commuter cargo trailer.

I can use this instead of the car for many things.

The kids are loving California. Kassi's art class is wonderful. She is learning single point perspective. I love the art that she brings home. Tristan started archery instruction.

He is so excited about it. Toly loves bicycling around. His passion for his bicycle is wonderful.

In fact, I am going to take them for a bike ride...

My thanks to the CMF

The *CMF was the catalyst that changed our life a few months ago. Now I have to say thanks. We are happy here. The kids love this place. An excellent library is a short four block walk. Books on preloaded i-pods--all you need are earbuds. A huge selection that boggles the mind.

Our most extraordinary friends live five houses away on our nearly traffic free street. Our house is the upper half of a huge victorian. It has exceptionally tall ceilings. It is open and filled with light most of the day.

We travel mostly by bicycle. Toly learned to bike well enough to travel three miles his first day sans training wheels. The farmers market (during winter) has a mind boggling selection of cheap, fresh produce.

Homeschooling with funding from the state to afford the multitude of classes available within a short bike ride. One of the best fencing academies in the bay area just six blocks away. Kassi has a weekly art class that is of a standard that adult students might hope for.

To top it all off, I have my dream job. They treat me so well that I have to regularly pinch myself. I get to do exactly what I like all day long. I feel good about making a difference in the world--installing solar. The systems are large and exhilarating to work on. The last job I worked had five inch diameter pipe. The collectors were six stories up from the mechanical room.

We are going to work with a new product. It uses tracking concentrated solar electricity integrating hot water dissipation and thermal capture of the heat. A hybrid system suited exactly for my skill set. Plus I have been tentatively assigned a huge radiant heating system in the queue. I am in my hay-day of interesting, taxing and enjoyable work.

We are off to bike around the island today. Our island is like a small town completely separated from, yet in the middle of the big city. It is completely flat and filled with old victorian houses, tons of stained glass windows. It is the perfect place to live with a family in the S.F. bay area.

So, thank you *CMF wherever you are. This life change, that I resisted, is an incredible blessing. We are happy here, although we might be happy anywhere, probably not this happy..

*Crazy Mother F'er

bike to the beach

This beach is biking distance from our house.

The kids love it.

Such a different world from Missouri

Moats and sand castles

Just a few blocks away

These waves are never big.


We are on an island in the S.F. bay.

It is still salty and a little wavy.

It reminds me of Lake Michigan.




Nothing scary about this body of water.

Rome had to be nekkid

many shells were collected

Kassi found a crab claw


There even was a para glider.

Sunday at Point Reyes

Point Reyes is a magical bit of the California coast. I took Tabitha there for our first afternoon together. I was stopping in at Petes for an afternoon coffee, where we met, I asked if she wanted to go to the beach. We were retracing our path and showing our kids one of the most beautiful places we know of.



The kids loved it. Toly was scared of the big noisy surf.


The surf was huge and crashing on the shore. Tristan and Kassi began running toward the retreating wave then running up the beach.


I closely monitored their frolicking.


Rome mostly stayed far back from the scary waves.


Many calories were spent.






The wave just after this one was huge and pummeled everyone.


Tristan remained fearless.


occasionally a huge wave would crash all the way up the beach. There was no safely dry place.






Tristan was drenched.

and covered in sand


I consoled Toly and Rome after the big pummeling.


Luckily we read this sign on the way out otherwise we'd have probably stayed on the bluff.