Sawdust machine

We need stop the madness of living in a house of boxes with little paths winding like a labyrinth. I know where nothing is, ever. The only way past this is to finish the master bedroom. Floors, paint and close the gaping hole I left in the wall from my shower plumbing exploits.

We rented a sander and went to work. It was grueling work with little visible reward. The layers were simply coming off too slowly. After about ten hours we admitted that this was "good enough." We switched to the next finer grit and gave it a once over. We decided that we'd leave the final grit for the morning just before we needed to return the sander.

Day 2
After sanding with sore muscles from the previous day and better light we finished it up.  I left with the rental sander. While I was gone Tabitha cleaned the entire room of dust. The next step was to seal the floor.

The gaping hole is still there from the shower but there is a 12 hour time gap between sealing and putting down the poly. We decided that people pay big money for "the distressed look."

While waiting for the sealer to dry I put new glass in the kitchen window.

I tore out the old fire trap gas wall heater.

I put in a quad outlet and drywall patched the hole.

Tabitha was scraping the overspray off the windows and noticed some glazing work that I needed to do. I use the window glazing in the tube. it works better for me. This widow got glazed and made openable.

The sealer was dry to the touch so I decided to work on the drywall behind the shower.

This wall needs an outlet. I also decided it could use a light switch to control one half of one of the outlets (1of the 4 plugs). This way we can plug in a floor lamp and operate it from a switch. I needed to go get a new box for the switch portion. 

Today is Sunday we are off to church then back to get a bit more floor work.

Bath anybody?

... The plumbing store was not open on Saturday. Feeling very defeated I tried OSH to see if they had a replacement valve for this new set. I sunk deeper into failure because they didn't have valve replacement parts for this new model. The guy working that section said that I should try the local hardware store just a few blocks from my house. I called first because I had already wasted precious time thinking my solution was simply at hand.

They said yes, they definitely had the innards for my valve. Glorious success was within reach. I stepped to the counter and set my valve down like an empty shot glass. He glanced at me then at it and spun to toward the bowels of the stacks. He returned with something that looked nothing like my valve.  Arragh, how much longer can this go on? Seeing the disappointment in my expression he went on to explain this is the valve that replaces my valve and it only looks different because it also replaces the previous model too. After asking about the return policy I tentatively drove home. Not able to repsond to Tabitha's inquiry with any confidence, "I said lets see if this one works."

Sweet sweet victory there will be bathing tonight...

Bathroom plumbing

The shower valve behind this tile was not working. I twisted the handle for the hot water and it broke in my hand.


I entertained the idea of replacing the valve portion. Replacing the innards of old valves is a very reasonable thing to do. Upon closer inspection I discovered that the plumbing in the wall showed signs of leaking. I cut into the plaster and lath wall and discovered old galvanized pipe that needed to be replaced.


I went to the local plumbing store and bought a shower set and got busy replacing it. Cutting out old galvanized pipe is difficult even with proper tools.



I was happy knowing that I am upgrading the plumbing and will soon have a beautiful new shower set.


After spending most of my day I finally got the unit installed to discover one of the valve stems wasn't tapped from the factory. It wouldn't hold my fancy new handle. by this time it was too late to exchange it since the store was closed. I decided to simply tap new threads into it--my first error in judgement. I tapped the threads and my handle held perfectly in place. I turned the water pressure on and the valve no longer worked--in the on position. arrgh.. I took the the valve apart and found that I had broken it during the tapping process.

It was late and I was defeated. I shut off the hot water and called it a day hoping that the plumbing store was open on Saturday.

Kitchen plumbing

I don't know how most people do it. I have loads of plumbing experience and I am just barely able to prevail.  I knew that there would be undiscovered issues but this issue took almost an entire day of precious time before we can move in. The kitchen sink obviously has been leaking for quite some time. I assembled my extensive plumbing kit and the few parts necessary and crawled under the house. The crawl space is very spacious I can sit on my knees and be upright throughout most of it.

I dug and cut out the bad pipe and installed new copper pipe under the kitchen sink. Luckily the local plumbing store gives me Sun Light & Power prices plus and additional 10% off. I didn't expect that! Two words, "shop local" it really is the best thing for everyone in the end.

My next endeavor is the bathroom tub. The bath/shower valves that are behind tile are old and leaky. I had to cut into the stucco in our bedroom to gain (behind) access to remove them. Being old, the faucets are offset to not correspond with any existing factory models. It seems that I have two choices; tear out tile work and use a factory handle and diverter set or buy pricey components and build my own to fit existing holes. Since I am not prepared to start any tile work at this time I plan to build my own. This should be quicker and the more elegant solution. Albeit twice as expensive I am consoled by the fact that I can do all the work myself likely saving hundreds of dollars. I only hope that my local plumbing store has the valves I want to match the handles we have chosen.

The tub drain and over flow are another matter altogether. I need to replace gaskets, rebuild them and use the old technology. It will be easiest and the best solution.
Today it the final day before we begin the great migration of boxes to the new house. The new fridge arrives tomorrow along with a new dishwasher. Yes, for those concerned parties Tristan will still get an weekly allowance for doing the dishes. Duties will simply change a little. We got an incredible deal on the new matching fridge and dishwasher, they were in the scratch and dent section. The exact fridge I had researched and planned, a dishwasher plus 4 year guarantee for the same price at the un-dented fridge. Tabitha is so excited to have a place to hide dirty dishes dishwasher. We hope to be sleeping in the new place by tomorrow night. The pre move check list follows:

• two clean and livable rooms to sleep and store stuff in.
• a refrigerator
• a clean bathroom with working shower/tub
• back yard containment, fence fixed and locked gates
• remove nasty front porch carpet

I cannot wait to sleep there. I can walk to work. I can work on the house anytime of day or night. These are exciting times. The list of closely following important improvements are:

• install washer and dryer
• prepare upstairs for a house blessing
• prep, sand and finish flooring in master bedroom
• paint master bedroom
• makeover master/Tabitha's closet to more useable space
• prep, sand and finish flooring in office/sewing room
• paint office/sewing room
• makeover office/Karl's closet to more useable space
• move-in and install new stove

We love our new house it will be "home" soon. 

More and more photos

It always ends in tears these days

There is a bit of water damage in and coming from the bathroom.

This is the view from the master bedroom to the bath.

The downstairs bathroom

View into the kitchen from the dining room, facing north...

The dining room, fireplace and Rome digging in his bag.

pulling more and more staples.

I got that ladder just behind me at an estate sale. It is so sturdy that Tabitha has been cleaning ceilings four rungs up. That is amazing...

Poser

The problem with buying a big house--there are many surfaces to clean.

Such beautiful light in the front room

and a beautiful girl too.

Toly took a bunch of photos of us cleaning today

hundreds of staples. Tristan was a big help--he always is..

O'Melays working together

such a serious photographer.

How they left the place--keeping it real

the downstairs back bedroom

No picts of the used condoms and the awful porn left here.

upstairs back bedroom

These pictures don't really do this justice. 

The strong smell of urine and cheap vanilla cigar smoke keeps the the gag reflex at "stand ready"

Respectfully yours,

flooring removal

We managed to get all the tack strip up from the downstairs. It was surprisingly difficult. The strips shredded into splinters instead of coming up in large pieces. I also made a dump run it was slightly over a ton. I had to wait in three queues, one for the mattresses, one for the refrigerators and the last for general refuse. Of course I had to wait to pay to get out too



If you ever know of, or become a person that puts down carpet padding. I have one request. Please be lousy and miserly at your job. Carpet padding doesn't need a staple every four inches. where is it gonna go anyway? it is frickin laying flat under the carpet. It doesn't need so many staples.

Also, I told Tabitha today that if she ever catches me building anything out of particle board shoot me on the spot--just put me out of my misery because surely have lost my mind.

It took me close to two hours to remove the vinyl and particle board underlayment from a small 4 by 7 hall section of the house. Three words, Ring Shank Nails. What is up with that? There were hundreds of them. Why?

By the end of the day tomorrow things will be very different at the O'Melay house. Progress is being made and it will be beautiful.

Hardwood floor discovery

Out tenants finally moved out. They were low-income/section-8 and lived up to most of the negative stereotypes. The house was and still is filthy. Two tons of refuse of the worst sort has already been taken to the waste transfer station. I have another huge load probably a ton or so to take this morning. I estimate another large load to follow by tomorrow. I could carry on about the filth and disgust but i need to talk of things that will be and the hope that lies there. Tabitha and I finally got down to the carpeting in the entire house and tore it up. It revealed the most beautiful surprise--lovely hardwood flooring.

this picture doesn't do this room justice. two of the rooms (living, dining) need no initial help. Our bedroom and future office need re-finishing. the upstairs needs serious repair in the front bedroom and the back bedroom seemed alright. although it was dark last night and it might reveal more today. the main room upstairs seems pretty good definitely a good sanding needed. more after todays efforts...

the new house day 1

tabitha and the kids take possession of our house this morning at 9 am. I have to work and cannot be there for the initial shock. so very exciting. there will be photos soon.

Time flies

The past two years since we have left Missouri many things have changed. I got my old and favorite job back. We moved back to Alameda. We rekindled many old relationships and started many more. We found a church that we love. California has embraced us with love and family. I fell sick with a bacterial infection which destroyed my heart valve. I had open heart surgery. Tabitha and the kids were horror struck with the possibility of loosing me. Our church (family), my coworkers (family), our friends (family) and neighbors (family) came to our rescue. Things were very bad but we were surrounded by love and compassion.

My recovery has been amazing, by the grace of God. Life since the operation has been gradually better and better. Kassi, Toly and Tristan take amazing art classes. We ride down to the beach on our bikes often--Rome loves the water. Tristan foil fences at the local academy. I usually go and watch him. Although, last night was my first time watching in a few weeks. He is amazing. He is really skilled, compassionate, gracious and loves it. I have gotten several promotions at work. Mostly I do what I love, so it is not really like work.

Our church is beyond words. The impossible happened we love our church so much that we miss it all week. Some of my older friends know how amazing this is. My oldest friends likely see it as a home coming.

Never during the past years did we imagine that we could own a house in California in a neighborhood that we could settle. Now it is really happening. The blessed grace that I feel overwhelms me. Thank you everyone that helped us and continue to help us. We are truly blessed to have you all.

Family photos

A test of faith

So we have been trying to buy this house. It has been one crazy roller coaster. The crazy peaks and unsettling dips seem to get bigger and deeper not closer together like they should. Anyone in the house buying market right now can attest these are crazy times.

I am resigning myself that this is a lesson of the classic Serenity prayer. "May God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can and the wisdom to know the difference." Boy that prayer is surely a tall order. It is the keynote in all the twelve step programs for good reason.

I have managed to mostly convince myself that I have enough wisdom that us getting into this house is Gods will. So we have been taking several leaps of faith. Our risk is financial and wouldn't ruin us--nearly though. The true ruin would come with the emotional heartbreak if this were to somehow fall through.

We love this house. It would be more perfect than any other house we could afford. We are in the final throws of the battle with lenders, seller and insurances. It is so scary and consumes many of my mental cycles that I have available at any moment.

My only prayer for this is that it is Gods will. The photo shows part of the backyard. Most, if not all, of the concrete would get removed and become garden. The yard is exceptionally large for Berkeley. †

Summer camp

Tristan and Kassi have been at summer camp all week. Tabitha and the boys drove them out there last Sunday after church. Tabitha and the young boys stayed overnight and visited the giant sequoias and swam in their pool.

We are leaving this morning to go get them. I will take photos and share.

The house buying is going well. We find ourselves chatting and planning as if it is already ours. It would be bitter heartbreak if things fell through at this late date. Tabitha has been amazing weaving through the bureaucracy and continually saving us money and unnecessary troubles.

The square peg and round hole

I am plagued by a question that a friend asked me last evening. I'm paraphrasing "What if anything seems to help your child when the ADHD/bipolar starts REALLY affecting everyone around?" The question was much more pleading and delicately posed. I could not answer at that moment. Probably because my answer requires too many subtleties and nuances for brief conversation. Mostly, I was dumbstruck.

I have a compassionate affection for his son, he reminds me of my older sister as a child. Having lost sleep last night over this I must attempt to congeal my feelings into a comprehensive and expressible thought. By the way, I know that I risk appearing judgmental--please don't take it that way. My motivations are love and compassion.

In comparing my child to his I feel as though I have been given certain liberties. My child is fine, your child is fine. He is simply a square peg and society is a round hole. There are two clear paths to take. Shave the square peg and attempt to fit him into the round hole. Or, wallow the hole out so that the square peg might fit.

Recent society overwhelmingly says whittle down the edges with drugs and conveniently that child fits. But what about those missing parts? What about the gaps? The missing parts are what makes your child unique. The gaps are to forever be filled with dependency on drugs--a behavior he is learning right now. To fit in I must take my medicine.

The most difficult path is the latter. It is difficult for everyone involved--especially you. Society seems unyielding and unrelenting in it's expectations. You must alter society and his surroundings for him. I know it sounds crazy but imagine what you are teaching him. As he grows up he will realize that he can mold the world around him. Soon he will know how to mold his world by second nature. Think of the truly great and successful people. They are the ones that mold the world around them.

Admittedly the square peg must be facing the proper direction but it indeed has a place to fit. That is your reprieve as a parent. There will be those moments where the stars align and everything just works. Your son is clever can realize this. He will alter his behavior to fit into an attractively shaped hole. It is the near impossible path since it is likely not in your nature to alter society, to change the rules, to stand out. Love will win-out.

I might fail at this tomorrow or in ten years. But, having had a sister on ritalin her entire childhood gives me an unusual perspective. For me this is what feels right. I (with my wife's help) can and will make a square hole for my child to fit. Else, I will fail but at least I have followed my heart to what I believe is right.

Hopefully we can live here someday?

This is the house that we are in escrow with. We really could use some well wishes and prayers. Tabitha has been amazing. She is nearly single-handedly making it closer to possible for us to buy this house in Berkeley. She has spent many many anxious and grueling hours filling forms, finding documents talking/negotiating with our real-estate agent and lenders, taking seminars meanwhile home-schooling our kids. The sinking feeling of complete lack of control is overwhelming. This will be quite a blog worthy adventure. The house needs an incredible amount of work.